December 29, 2009

I'm back home and reasonably rested. I was exhausted and it will take me a while to catch up on my sleep. I plan to go to the gym tonight -- not hoping for much beyond a brief cardio workout and maybe some upper body.

More importantly, I am going to focus on weaning myself from the exceptionally large amount of carbs that I have consumed over the past two weeks. I love them and have no regrets, but I think I need to add some more protein to my diet.

December 26, 2009

An entire week went by with no blogging. I had great intentions of repeating the previous week's 400+ minutes challenge, but I was thwarted by a blizzard. I did manage to eke out some strong shoveling workouts and visited the gym 2x. Unfortunately, I think I ended the week at around 300 or so -- not bad considering.

It's a new week and the final week of the year. I am still on vacation and find myself surrounded by leftovers while feeling the effects of jet lag. The best plan is any plan at all -- I am going to strive for the 350 minutes of cardio and I will start brainstorming about what to do for January 2010.

Crazy Cardio Stats: Week Seven

Saturday - 30 minutes Shoveling/Building Snow Castle
Sunday - 90 minutes Shoveling
Monday - 60 minutes Elliptical; 15 minutes Hiking through Snow
Tuesday - 20 minutes Walking (In and Out of Department Stores)
Wednesday - 50 minutes Biking; 15 minutes Lower Leg Workout; 10 minutes Walking (O'Hare)
Thursday - 5 minutes happily going up stairs
Friday - 25 minutes Lower Leg Workout

Minutes: 320 minutes (not bad now that I count)

Even Crazier Cardio Challenge: 400+

Saturday - 55 minutes Bike; 20 minutes Upper Body Workout
Sunday - 40 minutes Elliptical; 25 minutes Bike; 25 minutes Lower Body with Abs
Monday - 20 minutes Walking
Tuesday - 55 minutes Elliptical; 10 minutes Abs
Wednesday - 50 minutes Elliptical; 5 minutes Arms; 5 minutes Abs
Thursday - 25 minutes Walking; 35 minutes Bike
Friday - 30 minutes Walking...in snow

Minutes Achieved: 400..go me!

December 17, 2009

Toffee is one of life’s greater pleasures. One of the truly wonderful things about low residue living is the lack of fiber in some of the greatest foods in the American diet: cream, butter, and sugar. The holidays provide endless opportunities to mix, bake, caramelize and melt these fine ingredients into many different shapes and forms. I have dived wholeheartedly into this task and can say that I have had the aforementioned ingredients in at least four different ways in the last week. Thankfully, I have matched each of these wonderful confections with a 60+ minute workout. And, as I plan to continue to bake this evening, I will first pay a nice visit to the gym downtown where I will sweat.

Deep in the recesses of my brain there is a little voice that says that eating toffee, fudge, and cookies, and more cookies throughout the day is not a good way to manage a diet no matter how little fiber there is. But, I will continue to drown out this voice with my IPOD and the endless renditions of “This Christmas” on the radio.

In all seriousness, the volume of my eating has dropped from last week even as the caloric content of my selected foods has increased. The increased exercise is helping keep it all in check and I am having a wonderful time using the kitchen to produce things that I can eat and share. Surely these skills can be put to use with other ingredients, but I have not found anything so wonderful as the magnificent three.

In closing, I would like to capture the spirit of the holidays and take a few lines to cite in excruciating specificity things that have made me thankful in just the past week (in no particular order):

· My kitchenaid and the balloon whisk (for mixing);
· My two ovens (for warming the kitchen and baking);
· My Jumprope (for when things are in the oven and I am feeling guilty about overindulging);
· My Husband (for trying my baked goods and then whisking them away to the office before I get carried away);
· Donny Hathaway and the Temptations (for the two best Christmas songs ever);
· Starbuck’s (for keeping me going throughout the day);
· Hulu (for mindless tv on demand);
· USPS, UPS, and FedEx (for working really hard to get my cards, new furniture, and everyone else’s stuff – ie., presents – delivered on time);
· Cold, dry mornings (for making my scarf collection seem less frivolous);
· Texting (for making it easy to stay in touch with family and friends);
· The gym (for keeping me sane);
· My flat iron (for counteracting the frizzing effects of the gym as it keeps me sane); and
· My mom (for reminding me of the simple joys of a full stocking on Christmas morning).

And, I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t take a few minutes to cite what I am not thankful for:

· Parking Police (for doing impressions of Scrooge and dispensing tickets with such joy).
· Sadness (for preventing people from being able to appreciate the simple joys in life).
· Wintry mix (for being ambiguous wetness that makes driving dangerous without the added prettiness of soft-falling snowflakes.)

December 16, 2009

Another day, another workout. I cut today's shorter than I would have liked. But, I still got it in -- that's what matters. I am feeling extremely tired despite the workout and coffee. I hope it begins to fade soon.

December 15, 2009

It's 10:30 and I've already done in my cardio and ab work. I enjoy the flexibility of working at home and think getting up at the usual time and going to the gym helps me stay disciplined. I feel myself getting stronger and I can see the tone, but my weight loss has stalled. I suspect that it has something to do with my holiday eating? I've been holding steady since Thanksgiving, which is definitely something to be proud of -- but, I am going to push harder over the next week. Why settle for ok?

December 14, 2009

I am super tired today! I don’t think it has anything to do with yesterday’s wonderful workout even though I am sore. I think I just did not get a good night’s sleep as evidenced by my dreams about my presentation this morning (who dreams about a 4 minute presentation)? There is room for error in my workout schedule this week and I plan to go to the gym tomorrow morning even if I don’t make this evening. On the other hand, my second wind could be just around the corner! We’ll see. If I do make it, then I will be focusing almost exclusively on cardio and then an abdominal workout.

December 13, 2009

I had one of the most creative workouts ever today. It was one of those fun routines were I was inspired to use different equipment with every move. Kettlebells, medicine balls, dumbells, barbells, a bench, a bike, and an elliptical -- I got my money's worth out of my gym membership today. I like the freedom of going on a Sunday morning and having free reign on the equipment. Like last weekend, I experienced that wonderful sweet spot. How sweet it is.

Crazy Cardio Stats: Wow - Week Six

Saturday - 50min Bike/Arms; 35min Elliptical; 10min Abs; 20min Legs
Sunday - 50min Bike/Arms; 10min Abs
Monday - 40min Bike; 10 min Abs; 5min Legs
Tuesday – 20 min Walking
Wednesday -
Thursday – 25 min Walking
Friday – 20 min Walking

Minutes to Go: 55...Thwarted again…I need to get on top of this!

December 11, 2009

Yeah, so the week started out with a workout bang shebang and ended with a gingerbread fizzle. I am going to be positive about this and say that my room for improvement is so grand that next week is guaranteed to be a success. The window of opportunity for me to reach my end-of-the-year weight goals is rapidly closing, but it’s never too late! It’s all in the narrative…

So, despite earlier posts that say otherwise, I am going to treat this week as part of an elaborately developed plan to cycle my workout in order to maximize their benefits. The strong intensity of the first part of the week gave way to an extended break that allowed me to reap the effects of my work. (Yup, that sounds good – I am totally flexible!) Part two of my elaborate plan includes ratcheting up the frequency and intensity of my workouts in week 7. It is sounding better and better – I feel the need to write something sappy like… planning is believing. So, I am shooting for two things next week:

1) 400 minutes of Exercise – My average is 5 hours and it’s only an extra hour and 45 minutes.
2) At least five days in the gym – My mindset is better on the days I go. I actually get all the water in and I don’t give into the sugar cravings when I know I need the energy to workout.

I think this will be a great way to lead into the week of Christmas. I am working from home two days next week so it is the perfect set-up.

December 10, 2009

This week is going the way of last week. I’m off track, haven’t included items in my journal, haven’t exercised in three days, water intake is hovering around 30 oz per day, and my last good night’s sleep was over the weekend. It is what it is and I can’t drum up the energy to care. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

December 9, 2009

I didn’t make it to the gym yesterday, but I don’t think that is a bad thing. I hit a wall of exhaustion at about 1:30PM and never quite recovered. Unfortunately, the extreme fatigue put my sugar cravings in overdrive and I ate far more than usual during the day and early evening. Happily, I had the presence of mind to finish my third mini-dinner by 8:00PM and my sleep was not affected. Not so happily, I had to get up early and am sorely missing the extra 60 minutes of sleep between 6:00-7:00AM.

I am supposed – note the word choice – to make it to the gym tonight, but I think the jury is still out. It’s not even 1:00PM and all I can think about is a refill on my grande.

We’ll see what happens.

December 8, 2009

I am undecided on whether today will actually be an off day. I am tired – not quite enough sleep, but it seems more likely that I will workout today instead of tomorrow after my evening appointment. I am going to wait to see how I feel later this afternoon. I don’t think there is any chance of developing muscle fatigue from yesterday’s workout.

I’ll see how it goes.

December 7, 2009

It's nice to be on day three and still feeling that the week is off to a good start. I've gotten to the gym three of the past three days and achieved a nice balance between my weight lifting and cardio. I didn't get a great night sleep yesterday, but I am not overly tired. I think the frequent exercise is having a positive ripple effect on other parts of my life like sleep and overall optimism about my health. I have to keep this up!

Low Residue Sweet Spot

I reached the low residue sweet spot today. What exactly is the sweet spot? It's that moment in time when the decisions you make in the interest of your health feel like the best decisions for every part of you. No trade-offs, no regrets or resentment -- it just happens naturally.

The sweet spot came sometime before I made the decision to go the gym and it persists. It's really no big surprise that I went since I blog, talk, and plan for it every darn day. What is remarkable is how I felt as I was preparing to go and after I got there. I went to the gym because I thought it would relax me. I was tired from yesterday's super workout, but I figured I would make it work and I did.

I came home and indulged in some low residue sweets (mmm....smores) and I feel fantastic. It might be too much to expect to feel this way every day, but knowing it can happen is just the boost I need to keep going. Getting the workout/food stuff right is critical because it's a foundation for me to do all the other things that I enjoy.

December 6, 2009

I feel every last minute of yesterday's workout. It is a satisfactory, not all that unpleasant
feeling. I slept much later than intended and am finding it difficult to drag myself to the gym. Working out is no competition for drinking coffee while watching Sunday morning political shows as sunlight comes through the windows.

Maybe motivation will strike once the pundits give way to the infomercials. Maybe not.


Update: I made it! Riding the bike is relaxing in a way -- I was concerned that it wouldn't be enough of a workout, but adding weights keeps the sweat coming in buckets. (Gross, but true.)

December 5, 2009

Another week, another opportunity to make a plan and stick to it. I don't consider last week an overwhelming success. I got little exercise and my stomach didn't feel so hot more days than not. I am going to plan a little better this time. Like last time, I have something to do on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday evenings. In theory, this requires me to front load my exercise on the weekend and Monday and Tuesday. In practice, front loading can be excessively tiring and three consecutive days without exercise appears to be too much for my stomach to tolerate even if the weight stabilizing effects are the same. Thus, I plan to add a trip to the gym to my Wednesday evening after giving myself rest on Tuesday. I may use a little to caffeine to give me the energy to push through a workout that begins at 8:00PM.

It's worth mentioning that my eating during the last three days of the week was not good. I think the first day was ok, the second day wasn't great and by yesterday I knew I was in for a stomach ache and figured I should enjoy it. I went to bed (way to shortly after eating) and got up early to jumpstart my system with a double-cardio session at the gym. It seems to have worked, but I think it'll take another day to recover from the last few nights' meals. This is two weeks in a row and I am certain that it isn't worth it and that the best thing I can do next week is to try extra hard to stick to the diet that I've laid out.

Crazy Cardio Countdown: Five Weeks to Go

Saturday - 60 min Bike; 30 min Arms, Chest, Back,
Sunday - Rest
Monday - 25 min Walking
Tuesday - 25 min Walking; 40 min Elliptical; 40 min Bike; 10 min Stretching
Wednesday - Rest
Thursday - 25 min Walking
Friday - - 25 min Walking

Minutes to go: 70...

It didn't work out as planned, but it gives me something to strive for next week.

Is it contagious?

It goes without saying that my perceived success and failure addressing the challenges presented by managing a chronic health condition are largely affected by my environment. On a day working from home -- when fluid intake, calories, and energy expenditure are easily controlled -- things are wonderful. Things aren't as easy when scheduling has created multiple back and forth meetings that require moving between locations or when the sheer number of things that must be accomplished appear to depend solely on stamina. However, environment is not simply the physical space or activities that structure the day. People matter, too.

There have been a few splashy articles recently about how happiness and loneliness are "contagious." I also recently had a conversation with a friend who talked about how "draining" it can be dealing with individuals who are experiencing a lot of stress. This echoes the hypotheses of the studies that have garnered so much attention -- as individuals we are subject to and influenced by the behaviors and energy of those around us. I won't quibble with the science. I can only speak from my experience and try to use it as a guide for helping to build my capacity to handle the frustrations that I encounter on daily basis as I live low residue.

In short, talking to sad people makes me sad. I find myself empathizing with the problems or struggles that others are confronting. This is particularly true of close friends and family. There are two things that compound the effects of this empathy. First, I don't particularly like the effects of feeling bad and attempt to suppress them in an effort to not bring people down with me. Of course, this doesn't always work well and can have serious consequences when it backfires. (I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine. Oh wait, I'm not.)

Second, I relate through thoughts and emotions -- usually on a level that is far from superficial. No good at small talk, I often (unconsciously) seek out the meanings and motives behind others' words and actions. This is an excellent skill when applied in complex professional or personal situations that require analysis to "get to the heart of an issue" It is not so excellent when the situation calls for far less. It can draw out frustration or concern and it can unnecessarily heighten emotions at times when the exact opposite is needed. Sometimes things need to be kept light in order to help others and oneself address whatever problems they're confronting.

So, what to do? I am not going to start avoiding all the sad people I know. On the contrary, I have had success in the past helping some people to figure out what is bothering them and what they can do to change it. But, I need to work at keeping it positive and focused so to not allow myself to get dragged down into the negative feelings with them. That's no good for anyone.

Also, I need to be more forthright about the issues that I am confronting. Often, I don't have a problem sharing the issue -- I have a problem sharing my inability to address the issue. That's a control thing -- a desire not to be seen as not on top of things. This is not foolproof and sometimes (maybe most times) it is better to admit when things are not going well. Admitting weakness can be a strength.

So, how exactly does this relate to living low residue? Well, the energy or feeling that I most want to promote is peace of mind. The unpredictability of my health can often be at odds with this peace -- there is an uneasy equilibrium between wanting to be prepared to deal with anything and not wanting to live each moment like the worst is about to happen.

Dealing with individuals who do seem to be facing the worst provides an opportunity to remind them and myself that things aren't always that bad. This means keeping commiseration to a minimum and spreading positive thoughts and good cheer whenever the opportunity presents itself.

This reminds me that I need to start pulling recipes for my holiday cookies!

December 2, 2009 - Telecommuting

I feel every minute of yesterday's crosstraining workout. My stomach feels better than it has in days, but everything else hurts! It's great. Today I am doing something I should have started months ago -- working from home. A mid-week workday from home is a good way to manage energy levels without sacrificing productivity.

I am a bit of a traditionalist -- is that the right word? I believe that face to face time with colleagues provide benefits that aren't easily replicated with technology. Therefore, I struggle with wanting to be present and accounted for at my desk or in meetings instead of at home where I can squeeze in naps and rest during my downtime. Of course this struggle is not new to many people -- working parents or adult children caring for their parents come to mind. There are numerous working adults who benefit from the flexibility of telecommuting policies and I think it is counterproductive for me to "feel bad" about taking advantage for it for health-related reasons. It helps that I can honestly say to myself that I will be more productive today (and probably happier tomorrow) as a result of my work.

December 1, 2009

Another day, another missed workout – everything was going well until I realized my gym pants were at home. It would be difficult to recount in words the absolute disgust (and amusement) that I felt upon discovering that my workout pants were not in my bag. My meticulous preparation the night before fell short. Oops.

The effects of my silly mistake are twofold. First, my plans for the rest of the week are going to make it difficult to get in more than one gym workout between now and Friday. It looks like I am going to sacrifice an activity or sleep to reach my goal. Second, a few days of holiday eating minus cardio has caused scale creep that goes beyond the regular fluctuations that take place during the week. This is not where I would like to be on the first day of the last month of the year – I’ve set up an ambitious goal and learned that the small choices along the way really add up.

I am going to strive for an intense workout this evening. I think 60 minutes of moderate cardio followed by 30 minutes of weight training is a reasonable goal. I will also need to find an additional 60 minutes one day later this week. I am not yet certain when that will be, but late tomorrow evening or early Friday evening appear to be my best bets!

Yesterday didn’t go as planned, but today is another day. My stomach has returned to normal and I arrived at work early with the intent of leaving early to get in a productive workout at the gym. Even more exciting, all-natural Cheese Poofs from Whole Foods are the perfect mid-day snack. Their like a healthy, low-residue alternative to cheetos!

Dear Ms. Residue....

Questions often come up for individuals living low residue. This can be especially true during the holiday season, which can cause a buildup of a lot of residue...(did I really write that?) as one confronts short, cold days filled with baked treats and numerous events organized around said treats. I've addressed some of these questions here:

Dear Ms. Residue,
My annual office party is coming up in a few weeks. There may be a few pre-wrapped items for me to enjoy, but the rest of the food will be homecooked. I don't want to be rude, but I am concerned about eating something that could make me sick. What should I do?

Clueless in Cleveland

Dear Clueless,
This issue is faced by many dieters. Unfortunately, the traditional diet tricks simply will not do. Filling up on veggies is a low residue no-no. Taking "just a taste" of the most delectable items is tempting, but without alternatives to round out the "taste" you might consume 3-4x as much as you need. What should you do?

Do take a page from a traditional dieter and schedule one of your meals shortly before the party. You can't control the food or the environment, but you can control your hunger. Do take a plate and fill it with 1-3 small bites of some items. Carrying the plate around will give you some protection against annoying food pushers who have nothing better to do than to worry about what you are (or are not) eating. Finally, bring your own snacks. Yup, there is no shame in bringing a little low residue bar and finding a quiet corner to chow down.

Dear Ms. Residue,
I overdid it in the activity department in anticipation of the big holiday meal and now I am too tired to exercise even though I need it. What should I do?

Stuffed in Seattle

Dear Stuffed,
Activity is the best way to keep your digestive system moving, but too much can be self-defeating. Athletes know that overtraining can have negative effects on their body in the long-term and often use a light recovery day in between heavy days to help their body rest. A recovery day is an important short-term fix for too much activity, but it only addresses one part of the problem. It'll also be important to give your digestive system a rest the next day as it works through the food. Focus on eating small bites every 1-2 hours to keep things moving and drink plenty of fluids. Don't worry about consuming too few calories -- 6-8 mini meals (e.g., bread, 1 tbsp. peanut butter) of about 125 calories will get you through a low activity without shocking your metabolism too much. And, unlike a clear liquid diet, your body will recover more quickly.

Dear Ms. Residue,
I have a family meal coming up and I know I'll get asked that dreaded question, "so are you like on a diet or something. How come you eat so funny?" Some of my family and friends get it, but some don't. I never know what to say! What should I do?

Conflicted in Connecticut

Dear Conflicted,
There is no right answer, but there are certainly some fun responses to these types of questions. This issue comes up all throughout the year and can be intensely troublesome. Deciding what and how much to disclose about your health and nutritional needs is challenging -- especially if it is a moving target! The best response is almost always an honest one. "I have dietary restrictions that prevent me from eating certain foods, particularly those that are high in fiber" is a good place to start. Of course, the curious among of us will not stop there and will want to know every last thing you can eat. There is also the prospect of encountering the food skeptic -- those who look in disdain or disgust upon others who adhere to strict diets. And, who can forget "Me Too Mimi" -- the person who experiences random IBS symptoms every two years and thinks they can feel your pain.

You owe these individuals no more of an explanation, but it may be prudent to provide additional details to stop the line of questioning. Depending on the situation, a few key words or a mind-numbing lecture can have just the right effect on the interrogator. For the individuals I trust, simply saying "scar tissue from previous abdominal surgeries prevents me from digesting certain foods" will do the trick. For other individuals or in a public setting, citing "medical or personal reasons" can also have the same effect.

Don't be afraid to practice or try out some responses with your friends. The proper quick or "comeback" can be just the thing for turning an awkward situation into a meaningless one.

Ms. Residue

November 29, 2009

Yesterday was a contradiction. I had an excellent workout yesterday -- I simulated my own spinning class and spent an hour on the bike sweating buckets while going through several sets of arm exercises (shoulder, biceps, triceps) with 3 lb. weights. I followed the cycling with a vigorous 30 minutes arm, chest, and back workout and left feeling great. I kept myself active for the next 3-4 hours with chores and was worn out by the evening. This, of course, is when my discipline started to dissipate.

I think the combination of vigorous activity and relatively light activity made me tired and more susceptible to overeating. I had a decent portion of leftovers (yummy cheese and mac and scallops), but the small second portion was unnecessary. To make matters worse, I decided to top it off with a double serving (about 4-6 oz) of eggnog. The size and composition of this quite tasty meal was not welcomed by my stomach. As I said before, a little bit of cream, butter, and cheese are fine -- a moderate sized portion isn't. Just to make sure I finished my evening on the right note, I decided at about 9pm to have some gingerbread with -- you guessed it -- whip cream! This is actually quite funny as I write it.

So, the end result of my indulgence was none too pleasant. I spent the last hour of my semi-restful sleep with stomach pains because I couldn't quite wake myself up enough. The sharp, achy pain has subsided, but light to moderate discomfort remains in its place. In brief, I don't feel so hot. I suppose this isn't all bad. It is a not-too-subtle reminder of the importance of my planning and preparing for a daily dose of physical activity and reasonable mini meals.

I wouldn't be me if I didn't draft myself a "recovery plan." Sadly, I think the key to my plan is to avoid most dairy fats today in an effort to restore balance to my digestive system. I will make an exception for the cream in my coffee as it is a part of my regular diet, but cheese, pasta, etc. are out. I also need to scale back on the portions of my meals today. Something like almond butter will be critical today -- it'll enable me to get the calories I need for energy and a workout without the volume that overwhelms my stomach.

I am a bit too tired and still feel to ill to get in an early morning workout -- it's already 10am. I am going to push it back to early afternoon and still strive for 90 minutes, but it might be light if my stomach has not settled down. Finally, I've spent three of my last four days of vacation slacking on my eating late rule. This, like consuming alcohol, affects the quality of my sleep and both have to go to start the week off properly.

The Challenge Continues: November 28-December 4

Okay, so I decided yesterday that I am going to continue in my quest to complete 350 minutes of exercise each week from now until the end of the year. I also decided that I would build a little more structure into my workouts to see if I could increase my results. This is, in part, an effort to offset the diminished impact of workouts that comes from my body adapting to this level of activity. Here is my broadstroke overview of next week's workout plans:

Saturday
30 minutes Elliptical
30 minutes Cycling with Weights
20 minutes Leg Workout (Machine Based)
10 minutes Ab Workout (Floor)

Sunday
60 minutes Raking
30 minutes Cycling
10 minutes Ab Workout (Floor)

Tuesday
60 minutes Elliptical

Friday
30 minutes Cycling
20 minutes Leg Workout (Free Weights)

Plus, the 50-100 minutes walking my daily commute each week.

November 27, 2009 - The Day after Thanskgiving

I made it through the big day and now comes the hard part: leftovers A whole pan of crispy, bubbly, creamy cheese and macaroni beckons from the fridge. It has ganged up with the crunch, chocolately smores, and the plump rolls to challenge me to sustain my diet over the next week. I will persevere.

I suspect that I will be unable to resist having at least one roll, one serving of cheese and macaroni, and 1/2 a serving of smores. From a calorie standpoint, these items represent 2-2.5 of my six meals. In recognition of this fact, I will be eating as I would ordinarily for the first part of the day. I will have my preselected leftovers as an early dinner.

I don't have plans to go to the gym today. Instead, I will get my exercise by shopping. The cardio will come from walking up and down the aisles and my arms will stretch and strain to pull merchandise off the racks. Best of all, trying on clothing is a great appetite suppressant.

I am feeling pretty optimistic about my plans for the cardio week that begins tomorrow. I laid out some exercise goals and think I will revisit my cycling with weights routine in the morning.

Thanksgiving Day

The big day has arrived and my plans are set. I'll spend the day reminding myself of my goals; make my way to the gym for a moderate workout; and will use excruciating detail to describe my eating for the day (the splurge will be in the type of food, not the approach).

I feel a tension between wanting to fully participate in the excitement of preparing and eating the meal and wanting to lock myself away until it is over. But, to manage the tension I have decided to prioritize my selections so I can keep my focus as the day wears on and my discipline decreases.

First Priority:
Macaroni & Cheese (1/2 cup)
Sweet Potato Rolls (1)
Homemade Vanilla Smores (1)

Second Priority:
Goat Cheese, Fig, Cheese Profiteroles (2)
Bourbon Spiced Cider Cocktail (1)
Crispy Scallops (2-3)

Third Priority:
Gingerbread with Lemon Creme (a sliver)
Cheese and Crackers (2)

Fourth Priority:
Corn and Lemongrass Shooter (1)
Black Truffle Pate (1 tbsp.)


Whoo! Just looking at it gives me a twinge of fear. Gosh, I really don't want to wake up with a stomach ache tomorrow. That is probably the best motivation of all so maybe I should go back up and assign myself some rough estimates of what I think I can tolerate.

It'll be heavy on the carbs and dairy. I think my biggest concern will be bloating, rather than an actual blockage. I could increase the scallops to up my protein intake, but I think I'll take my chances and have a string cheese pre-workout and greek yogurt + kashi fruit bar post-workout. I'll cross my fingers on the dairy.

Crazy Cardio Stats: Week Five (Technically)

Saturday – 50 min Elliptical; 10 min Wave; 20 min Lower; 10 min Abs
Sunday – 15 min Elliptical; 35 min Bike; 30 min Upper
Monday – 25 min Walking
Tuesday - 25 min Walking; 35 min Bike
Wednesday - 25 min Walking
Thursday - 20 min Elliptical; 10 min Bike; 20 min Upper
Friday -

Minutes to Go: 20...

Monthly Progress Check

I am well on my way to reaching my workout goals for the week -- 70 minutes to go. The original magazine article suggested that four weeks of commitment to 350 minutes of a week would help me lose eight pounds and they were right. I had a false start and missed my goal one week, but I am about eight pounds lighter and much stronger than when I started in October. Yay!

I need to define fitness plans for December and I haven't come up with anything too creative. I think I can probably squeeze another month of creativity out of the 350 challenge before I get bored and need something new. I shouldn't complain -- 350 minutes of exercise or 60 minutes for six says a week is a sensible way to lose weight. So, I will stay with what works and plan to get 350 minutes of exercise per week in December.

I also want to define my nutrition goal. Something that will be essential during the holiday eatfest. I have been sticking pretty closely to the six - 250kcal meals per day, but my journal writing has slacked off. So, my priority is "if I bite it, write it."

It's important to articulate outcomes with any goals. I've shied away from a weight goal in favor of the fit of my clothes and changes in physical strength. But, I think I will need something more concrete to keep me motivated. (I think some of this is motivated by some not so subtle prodding from my doctors -- they look at the numbers.) It is pretty simple -- I want to see the other side of 130 by New Year's Eve. I'd settle for 129.9. Mostly, I suspect that dropping below 130 will put me into 80-90% of my wardrobe, which makes sense because that was right around the point when I started shopping for clothes when I reached my WW goal.

I suppose I could refine the fitness plans more and say something about the number of push-ups or sit-ups, but I don't want to get that detailed right now.

November 23, 2009

Okay, well the dreaded week is here and I am off to a good start. I am in the 3rd of (sort of consecutive) 4 weeks of 350 minute Crazy Cardio Challenge. Getting through the last 40-75 minutes can be challenging, but I know the secret is pushing myself on the weekends, resting, sufficiently and then making it to the gym at least 2 times. No real magic – just good planning.

However, this is still a dreaded week. Why? I LOVE THANKSGIVING! The smell of crispy cheese and the way cold butter melts when you spread it on a hot roll – it makes my eyes glaze over in anticipation. The whole day is devoted to overindulging in goodies and I often find it hard to resist. I have perfected the small portion size at the dinner table, but I am usually doomed long before the meal begins. My official duty as taste tester is often enough to help me graze my way to fullness, but there is a sense of obligation to partake in the meal with others – even as your stomach protests. And, then there are the leftovers. I suspect my stomach can withstand one day of overindulgence, but 2-4 days of eating rich and unfamiliar foods can be too much. So, I have to have a plan. Well, duh. I’m not exactly dropping rocket science here:

1) Cardio, cardio, cardio – No different than usual, but I definitely need to get a workout in on Thursday morning. My digestion seems much better when I keep it active. My usual gym is closed, but I have a backup in mind. If not, I will be spending the day walking around the neighborhood or raking. Anything to keep the activity up. And, depending on my shopping plans I might include a workout on Friday morning, too.
2) Prime the pump – I really wanted to use this term for some reason. I don’t think my body tolerates excessive amounts of fat well and I have been trying to include some in my diet at least 1-2x week (crispy buttery cheesy bagel yumminess). I think this is enough to make a serving of macaroni and cheese manageable, but no overdoing it.
3) Tracking – This will be incredibly annoying, but it should be enough to make me think twice.
4) Only two for you – I will toss my traditional “one and done” rule, but no more than two cocktails. I before dinner and maybe a second with the meal. This is very important because my resistance gets lowered.
5) Share my goals – This is probably annoying for others, but the best way to help other help you is to let them know your plans. I am sure not everyone wants to know the excessive details about my workouts (there is a reason why it gets put on paper a lot), but it is good to have someone there to help you stay on track.

Okay, well that is the plan. I have my gym clothes with me for a workout this evening and I’ll be there pushing myself as hard as possible. My motivation over the weekend was a little different than usual. It feels like the end of the month and I am cramming deposits in to offset the really big check that is going to hit on Thursday. After I get through the week, I’ll go back to a “healthier” mindset. For now, I am not looking for the numbers to drop – I just don’t want them to creep up!

Crazy Cardio Stats: Week Four

Saturday – 60 min Elliptical; 30 min Lower Body Training
Sunday – 60 min Raking Leaves; 25 min Bike; 20 min Upper Body Training
Monday – 25 min Walking
Tuesday – 15 min Walking
Wednesday – 25 min Walking; 40 min Elliptical
Thursday – 25 min Walking
Friday – 25 min Walking

Minutes to Go: 0

November 16, 2009

Nutrition and Exercise Check

What I am eating:

Six small meals a day is still working. I’ve made some tweaks here and there – added a few berries to the yogurt, and switched out ff mayo on mini-sandwiches for sweet hot honey mustard. Little changes make a big difference – I enjoy what I am eating and haven’t fallen off the wagon too much. The wagon is defined broadly here – when I do eat a large meal (yummy homemade egg and cheese bagels sandwiches toasted with butter), I eliminate meals to account for the increased calories. And, I am being a little more flexible in the evenings and on the weekends with how I reach the approximate 250kcal mark. A few fishsticks or 2 tablespoons of almond butter smeared on a small slice of bread add variety and satiation.

I should add something about my decision to buy a pint of ice cream the night before I embarked on my 24hour clear liquid diet. I have no regrets and have not visited my friends Ben and Jerry in ages. My great intentions of tossing the pint after Wednesday didn’t work out, but I at least attempted to build the calories into the small meals after the exam was over. The real accomplishment came yesterday evening when I resisted the urge to buy another one. It’s back to 100 calories desserts for me!

What I am doing:

The walking continues – I get in at least 1.5 miles four days per week. I suspect that I will have to lower my minutes in December – I haven’t decided yet if I am going to change my workout plans next month, but I am likely to try to keep up the 350 minutes until the end of the year. It is a good framework and will be due for an overhaul after New Year’s. And, it’ll be a good time to see where I am and take stock and assess where I am going for spring 2010.

In the meantime, I average about four days in the gym per week doing approximately 45-60 minutes of cardio. At least two of those days are spent with an additional 20-30 minutes of strength training. I am still doing a pretty poor job of alternating between cardio machines, but my strength training moves are constantly changing (free weights, machines, etc) and I don’t think I have done the same thing more than twice in the last four weeks.

The Results:

The pounds are coming off. I have tried to keep the focus away from numbers and on how I feel. However, I still way myself every morning (especially important for tracking my fluid intake/loss) and I went from hovering around 141 to 144 to 134-137. So, that looks to be about 7 or 8lbs give or take in about 4 weeks; or, the magic standard of 1-2lbs. per week.

My stamina is up. A few weeks ago, level 20 was impossible on the Elliptical and now I need to go there to break a sweat sometimes.

My strength is up. The biggest change is definitely in my lower half. The reliable combination of squats, lunges, and deadlifts are great when coupled with the Elliptical, walking, and taking stairs.

My tone has increased. I think this is the slowest area of progression; as my trainer not so delicately stated – my muscles are buried underneath a layer of fat. I think the tone that I desire will come, but it will be harder than it was a few years ago. I don’t take lightly the jokes about not being 25 anymore – and I suspect that my workouts will require more planning and structure in the new few months. But, that’s a project for 2010!

Is the Glass Full? Do I Remember Where I Left the Glass?

I’ve lost track of what day I am on and I don’t think I’ll spend the time counting backwards. My desire to be optimistic is competing furiously with my tendency to be pessimistic. The week is off to a great start – I am more than 2/3 of the way through my Cardio Challenge for the week – that’s nearly four hours of sustained exercise by 10am on the Monday morning. So, why the pessimism?

I hurt!

Yesterday brought weather worth writing about – clear skies and bright sunshine after days of rain. It seemed a perfect day to get out in the yard to do official homeowner activities: raking leaves. I admit to taking breaks for breakfast and calls, but when the last leaf was stuffed into the bag it had been five hours. My muscles were vaguely aware of the workout they had received, but just to be sure I decided to traipse to the gym to polish off my weekend with a brief bike ride and some upper body training session.

I can’t move.

Well, I did get myself to work. However, I think I could stay in my chair for the next eight hours with little complaint. I know, of course, that this will increase my stiffness. I also know that stretching and light cardio are my best bets if my energy levels are high enough later this evening. But, I think I will think twice before engaging in several hours of yard work followed by the gym late on a Sunday. I need more recovery time than I allowed myself. Nevertheless –

My optimism is peeking out.

I felt great yesterday. Constant motion and moderate activity do wonders for my physical health. My mood is great and the abdominal pains that I have been experiencing have been replaced by twinges in joint and aches in muscles. It’s not a perfect trade-off, but it is manageable.

My optimism is pulling ahead.

Dude! I did five hours of yard work and then went to the gym – a day after I completed a 90 minute early bird workout. None of this would have been possible a month ago. It wouldn’t have been possible a year ago.

I have managed to claw back to a level of physical fitness that I haven’t seen since early 2008. It’s incredible because early 2008 was when it began to decline – right around the time that I started having problems with the ongoing partial obstructions. I found out last week that this is the new reality. With the pronouncement of a “healthy, yet scarred” digestive system came the knowledge that I would be unable to return to the “old” me. It sucks, but the new “have to be disciplined a whole lot of the time” me isn’t so bad. And, I think that going through the ups and downs will probably make me stronger than I was before. (Hmmm…I think part of this may be coming from my newfound love of fitness magazines – you know real ones – with actual workouts and advice.)

Crazy Cardio Stats: Going for Week Three

Saturday – Rest
Sunday – Rest
Monday – 25 min Walking; 35 min Elliptical; 5 min Abs; 5 min Lower
Tuesday - 15 min Walking; 50 min Elliptical; 5 min Abs; 10 min Lower Body; 20 min Upper
Wednesday - Rest
Thursday - Rest
Friday - 25 min Walking

Minutes to go: Much More than 0...Better luck next week!

Crazy Cardio: Let's Make it Two Weeks in a Row

Saturday – 50 minutes Elliptical; 5 minutes Lower Body Strength Training
Sunday – Rest
Monday – 25 minutes (moderate) Walking; 65 minutes Elliptical; 20 minutes Lower Body Strength Training
Tuesday - 25 minutes (moderate) Walking
Wednesday - 25 minutes (moderate) Walking; 40 minutes Elliptical; 10 minutes Abs
Thursday - 25 minutes (moderate) Walking
Friday - 20 minutes (moderate) Walking; 40 minutes Elliptical

Minutes to go: 0!!!!!!

Friday, November 6: Day ???

Reaching goal two weeks in a row feels good! I probably should say that it feels great, but I know I have much more work to do. I want to continue to strive to complete the crazy cardio minutes – the magazine article did say four weeks to a better you – and, I am only halfway there. Moreover, next week is going to present a few challenges – one is a natural part of the process and the other is unique to this week. I am going to need Planning and Persistence to see me through Week Three.

Challenge 1: Adaptation

This is not exactly a bad thing. My body has had at least two weeks to get used to the change in diet and routine. My taste buds are hovering dangerously between boredom and outright rejection of last week’s favorites. The stairs don’t produce the same burn and my heart rate takes longer to get up to speed during my favorite Elliptical workout.

Adaptations = diminished returns. It’s ironic that getting comfortable with a routine means you have to change it. Two weeks is a good amount of time to cycle through changes in diet and workouts and I’ve scoured the magazines looking for tweaks that I can make to maintain progress without losing my enthusiasm. Here is what I am prepared to do:

1) New Cardio Playlist – I am totally bored with my current selection. I cycle through shuffle and drain my battery looking for songs that will keep me moving at a vigorous pace. It’s time for some new beats.

2) New Cardio Routine – I don’t have choice next week, which I’ll get to in a minute. I have a few ideas for helping to switch it up – circuits will be my focus.

3) Condiments – Again, I will not have a choice this week. I don’t want to get rid of my base foods (e.g., yogurt, protein cereal, and mini sandwiches), but I will play around with the add-ins and condiments to avoid overeating in the evenings because of boredom. Next week might require actual calorie cycling from day to day, but I’ll put that idea on hold.


Challenge 2: The Dreaded Medical Exam

Nothing says obstacle like an unwanted, semi-invasive (to be fair, I think thermometers in the ear are invasive) medical exam in the middle of the week. The exam itself is painless. The anticipation and preparation are not.

Vigorous workouts are my best tool to combat the stress that comes from worrying about sedation, beeping machines, antiseptic hospital smells, and the exam follow-up. Unfortunately, clear liquid diets are not conducive to vigorous exercise. And, I can’t predict right now how I will feel on the day of the exam. Grogginess and fatigue may counteract the desire to sweat it out.” So, I need to be creative. My strategy is pretty simple:

1) Blogging – Writing is the sitting down equivalent to “sweating it out.” Expressing joy for the mini-triumphs and concern about the not-so-mini setbacks keeps everything in perspective. No matter what happens next week, I will keep to my commitment to write down daily what is happening.

2) Acceptance – Yeah, so next week is going to come no matter what (tomorrow in fact). And, the only thing I can control is my reaction to everything that happens. That should be my only focus – worrying about things I can’t change is a distraction that keeps me from devoting energy to what I can.

The Exercise Plan

Okay, so I need to work around a 24-hour liquid diet/holiday on Wednesday and sedation on Thursday morning. This should be fun!

Update: Yeah, this was way unrealistic...

Saturday:
Rest
Regular Diet

Sunday:
25 min Elliptical; 25 min Lower Body Strength Training; 25 min Upper Body Strength Training; 25 min Treadmill
Regular Diet

Monday:
25 min (moderate) Walking; 25 min Elliptical; 25 min Bicycle
Regular Diet

Tuesday:
25 min (moderate) Walking; 30 min Elliptical Intervals; 20 min Upper Body Strength Training
Heavy Diet

Wednesday:
25 min Bicycle
Clear Liquids: Protein Water; Clear Regular Gatorade; Tea with Honey

Thursday:
Rest
Light Diet

Friday:
25 min (moderate) Walking; 30 min Elliptical Intervals; 20 min Lower Body Strength Training
Regular Diet

Minutes: 350

Day Sixty-Five

It's raining. The splittzle from the sky provides the perfect cover for ignoring my workout plans (and chores) and curl up with a cup of hot cocoa. And marshmallows. And graham crackers. But, a lot of days in the winter give us reason to ignore the outside and to cheat on our goals. I'm going to stick with it. The only reason that I can come up with right now is the bowl of leftover Halloween candy sitting downstairs in the bowl. Sitting at home and ignoring my chores would maybe be okay, but giving into that temptation once or twice or three times is not. I'm going to keep my plans.

Day Sixty-Four

I ended up taking three days off at the end of the week. I think I would have been better with just two, but I am content that I reached my fitness goals. Today marks the start of a new week and I am already off to a good start. I went to the gym today and got in a solid 50 minutes on the Elliptical. I finished up the session with a good burn on the leg press machine and I'm prepared for a more intense workout tomorrow.

I am sure that I can reach my goal again next week. Taking a few days helped me avoid boredom, but I know that I'll need to switch up my routine (there's more to life than the Elliptical) to help keep myself motivated and working at a similar intensity.

Asking for Help

It seems at times that the most effective way to manage a chronic health condition is to minimize its impact on your life and too focus on the positive. This strategy make work a significant part of the time, but it is bound to fail at some point. Having a chronic health condition means that one is not fine all the time. It is simply a reality. During a flare or when experiencing complication it almost becomes easier to pretend that things aren't as bad as they seem, but they are. And, not being able to communicate what is happening or the effects that it has on your physical and mental health can cause problems that linger long after a flare goes away. The "grin and bear it" mentality must make room for the "this really does suck" mindset every once in a while. This does not have to be the first step on a slippery slope of pity parties. In fact, asking for help and receiving it is a natural part of the healing process. One just has to remember to nurture and give back in the times when they are feeling well again.

This is Not Top Scallop

I love Top Chef. At best, the routine and discipline demanded by my diet makes planning meals and eating a chore. At worst, it is something that inspires fear and loathing. The hours that I whittle away planning my diet (or, more accurately -- planning to avoid eating things that are not in my diet) does not inspire me to want to cook or have fun in the kitchen. Top Chef changes that. Seeing the culinary artists at work -- the pride they demonstrate in their craft and the colors, flavors, and smells it produces reminds me that food can be enjoyed and that the emotions evoked need not be negative. Top Chef makes me want to test myself in the kitchen and I think that the coming winter months will provide an opportunity to refine my low residue recipe portfolio. First on the list, of course, is scallops.

Don't Call it a Cure

The colon manifests symptoms, but is not the actual cause of inflammation in ulcerative colitis. So why would removing it be the cure? Isn't that like removing your head when you have a headache or your ear during an earache. Isn't a cure supposed to treat the cause instead of the symptoms? Pondering this stuff could send one around in circles. However, the absurdity of trying to remove a head for a headache goes a long way towards helping me see the hilarity of treatment for IBD.

It's not lost on me that doctors use language like "managing symptoms" when discussing new drugs. Cure seems to be a word reserved for races and researchers. I am a strong supporter of these efforts and have donated dollars for many a cause, but I just don't have doctors that talk about cures. Maybe they learned to talk about "manging symptoms" in a class devoted to managing expectations? It is fine and even necessary for surgeons and cutting edge researchers to talk about new advances and fix alls, but I suspect that the practitioners charged with the day-to-day care of chronic health conditions spend more time worrying about patients taking medicine and not developing troublesome side effects. Is this right?

Should doctors be talking about cures?

Crazy Cardio Stats: A success

Crazy Cardio Stats: Days 57-63

Saturday – 40 minutes Elliptical; 20 minutes Treadmill; 30 minutes Upper Body Strength Training & Abs
Sunday – 40 minutes Elliptical; 25 minutes Lower Body Strength Training & Abs
Monday – 40 minutes (moderate) Walking; 40 minutes Elliptical
Tuesday - 25 minutes (moderate) Walking; 40 minutes Elliptical; 5 minutes Abs
Wednesday - 25 minutes (moderate) Walking
Thursday - 25 minutes (moderate) Walking



Minutes to go: Who knows?! I already reached my goal and I have a day to go!

Day Sixty-Two

Yesterday was a so so day.

I decided to forego the gym. I think I would have been able to scrape up the energy to go, but my muscles felt extraordinarily fatigued and I felt a rest day would better equip me to do an effective cardio and strength training workout tonight. However, I feel tired and overly sluggish today and don’t have the same excitement for my workout that I did just days ago. I am not sure if it is the cumulative effects of so much activity or the result of little exercise and (comparatively) poor eating last night. I stayed within my calorie limits, but it was through a combination of poor choices.

I am hopeful that my enthusiasm and energy will pick up as the day progresses. I’ve known for a long time that the mindset is critical and that confidence in my ability to accomplish my goal is the difference between success and failure. I need to remind myself of why I am putting in the effort and how it is beginning to payoff. So, with a thought to focusing on the positive:

Including today, I have gone to the gym 8 of the past 13 days.

I have written consistently in my food diary for the past 9 days.

I have consumed at least 8 ounces of water for the past 9 days. (Not necessarily something to boast, but I wasn’t doing it before so I give myself credit!)

For my efforts:

I have felt good in everything that I have put on this week.

Stop. Did I just write that? Wow. Every morning this week I have picked out an outfit, tried it on and felt good about the way I looked! I wouldn’t have realized it if I hadn’t written this down, but it is true. I even wore a pair of pants yesterday that I haven’t worn in several months. I unpacked my clothes this weekend and had to stuff a drawer full of items that just don’t fit – they’re 5-10 pounds away from where I am now. I put them in another closet because I thought looking at them ever day when I was getting ready would set me up for failure. Who wants to start off the day that way? I left behind all the items that do fit and I have been focusing on looking good and maximizing what I can wear. It’s working.

The scale is moving down.

I am not going to put very much stock in this because any real trend will become evident over time. My weight has fluctuated within a 6 pound range over the past week and a half and it looks to be consistently going down. However, much of this could be water and I don’t want to get too caught up in the exact number yet.

I feel stronger physically.

My heart rate goes up and my brow begins to perspire as I make my morning jaunt to the subway, but it gets better each day. My legs protest when I go up and down the stairs, but I see and feel the results in everything I do. A burn settles in to my quads as I start my cycle on the Elliptical, but it soon gives way to resolve to finish the routine that I’ve set out for myself.

I feel stronger mentally.

I am completely confident that I can and will achieve my goals. I find reasons to smile in the morning and throughout the day and the ups and downs seem to effect me less.

Day Sixty-One

am going to reach my goals this week. This is the first time since I started writing that I can say that I concretely achieved a goal within the time period. And, it is not just one – the crazy cardio challenge has been fun. However, evenly spacing small meals and focusing on my water intake has been consistent as well. My sleep has been off for the past few days – I have been waking up in the middle of the night. But, I am still averaging 7 hours per night.

Getting a schedule down for my commute has been really helpful. It’s like a good diet – having a nice frame or base from which to work makes the deviations a little less harmful. Obviously, I can’t control meetings and evening events – but, sticking to this at least three nights of week will be great. Here is how it shapes up:

7:15 Up; Breakfast; Get Ready
8:20 Walk to Subway (.6 mi)
8:35 Depart Subway One Stop Early for Starbucks!
8:45 Walk from Starbucks to Work (.7 mi)
9:05 Start the Work Day; Focus on Water and Mini-Meals
6:30 Depart Work for Gym
7:00 Arrive Gym; Workout for Hour (50 minutes of Cardio w/stretching or 30/30 split of Cardio and Strength Training)
8:00 Depart Gym/Get on Subway
8:25 Depart Subway; Walk Home (.6 mi)
8:40 Arrive Home
10:30 Bedtime

The planner in me views the above as near perfection. Why? Because I believe that planning + discipline = goal achievement. The coming winter months are challenging. It gets dark sooner and the cold weather drives me home to eat instead of to the gym. However, I am really determined to make this work and looking at it in print makes the crazy cardio challenge slightly less crazy, too. I am sure I can keep this up for at least the next four weeks as I’d originally planned. And, then I can see where I stand.

Next Week – I know already that it will be challenging next week because of jury duty and at least one planned dinner. I will have to leave the house earlier in order to make it to Starbuck’s before getting to the Courthouse at 8:30. However, I will be done earlier, which means I can push up my gym time by a 60-90 minutes and then get home and get to bed earlier. Perfect!

Fighting Fatigue

Fatigue

I said earlier that fatigue is the enemy and I meant it. I seem to spend as many hours trying to plan rest (really) as I do counting calories. There is some sort of cosmic irony that it exhausts me trying to get rest. I am constantly fighting without myself (especially on the weekends) to sit down and relax. It feels like I work hard during the week with little time to get the stuff done that I need and when the weekend comes I am ready to go!

Unfortunately, failing to carve out appropriate rest time on the weekends sets me up for failure the following week. What is more, I view weekends as the perfect time to get in intense workouts that I don’t always have the time for on weekdays. This process (usually a Saturday morning) provides great short-term energy, but eventually it dwindles and by Sunday mid-afternoon I am done. If I am not careful, then overdoing on the weekend (and weekdays) can affect my sleep, ability to exercise, and diet for days to come. I am trying out some new things to get my energy boosted and it is my hope that I will see an improvement over the next couple of weeks. (I realize that trying like crazy to get in 350 cardio minutes may seem to contradict efforts to relax, but I am counting a percentage of my commute in my totals and gym time has to be like eating in order for me to be successful. The how and what of going can vary, but the going is non-negotiable.

Fatigue-Busting
I looked online, reviewed my food journals, talked to my doctors and reflected on what I could do to increase my energy. This is what I came up with:

1) Drinking at least 10 glasses of water every day. I have been lax here and I shouldn’t be.
2) Taking a multivitamin with iron. The absorption problem is an issue, but my doctor recommended a chewable kids version. This – on top of shakes, bars, and vitamin-fortified cereals – is a no-brainer.
3) Eating 6 small meals evenly-spaced throughout the day. Stabilizing my energy levels throughout the day prevents sugar binges, which increase poor eating and fatigue.
4) Going to bed by 10pm. We moved nearly three weeks ago and the television still has not been set-up. Coming home in the evenings and focusing on decompressing has helped me sleep more. I also think I sleep better.
5) Exercising daily. It is hard to go to the gym when you’re tired and at times, I have been known to overdo it in this department. However, I think physical activity helps much more than it hurts. Some days I get to the gym and feel like I can only do 20 minutes – I think that’s ok because you don’t know what you can do until you push yourself. Some days I don’t get to the gym at all, but that’s okay. On the really difficult days, I make sure to take the long way on my commute, do a few push-ups, take extra stairs or anything that reminds my body that I expect more from it in the days to come.
6) Planning to relax. I told my mom recently that managing a chronic health condition feels like a part-time job some days. Juggling doctor appointments, writing down foods and liquids, feeling the need to be attuned to seemingly minor symptoms that may portend something more serious -- the time and discipline required takes its toll. It is admittedly self-driven. I don’t know if everyone approaches it this way -- I think that my need to understand and analyze habits can be maddening when applied to my own health. This wanes on occasion, but usually comes back in full force if something goes wrong or I start to feel ill. The remorse one feels for eating one too many dessert or having one too many drink is nothing compared to the regret that comes when you feel that you could’ve avoided feeling ill.

My doctors are quick to reassure me that much of what I experience is outside of my control, but much doesn’t mean all. Little things like sleep, diet, and exercise make a difference and those are the things that I am trying to address. This need to plan for all of these factors results in me sometimes forgetting what true relaxation feels like. Turning the brain off – ignoring all of the things that I have to do can be difficult and my best strategy has been to set aside actual time to do this. Friday nights and Sundays after 2 are usually good for this and I like to keep a least 1 weeknight free. Anything more, however, and I start to get too comfortable. I haven’t yet figured out how to relax without also saying “I don’t care what I eat!” or “I can stay up all night reading a book or watching Grey’s reruns!” Too much relaxation can be a bad thing.

Day Sixty

It’s been three weeks. It took me a while to calculate the date, but that is about write. I want to take stock of where I have been and where I think I am now.

Nutrition
The week of my move and the following week were not so great. I spent four days surrounded by Southern cooking (need I say more), moved (lots of takeout), settled in (still lots of takeout, but now layered with fatigue) and finally got myself on track. I now have a schedule that makes me proud.

For the past week, I have been eating breakfast every day, drinking at least 8 oz of water, and striving to eat approximately 6 meals (about 250kcal ea) per day. The day looks something like this:

Breakfast
Protein Cereal w/ Milk (225)
Coffee (35)

Snack
Bar (110)
Fruit Chips (40)
Coffee (60)

Lunch
Veggie Salami Sandwich (180)
String Cheese (80)

Snack
Greek Yogurt (90) w/ Vitamin 100 cereal (110) or Bar (190)
Coffee (60)

Dinner
Seared Tuna w/olive oil or Veggie Sausage Sandwich (180)

Snack
100 Calorie Cake & ½ glass wine or cocktail (250) or
WW dessert (180)

Exercise
I have yet to fully complete the cardio challenge, but I am on pace to try to complete it this week. I had hoped to go through several cycles over the past month, but life intervened. I will post my stats separately, but I am on schedule to complete this week. (As long as I get enough sleep – it is clear to me that this is the critical component that knocked me off during the week of the move and subsequently. New commute, new schedule, endless boxes to unpack.)

On the upside, my new commute is great from a cardiovascular standpoint. I walk approximately 1.3 mi (some of it on an incline) before I sit at my desk every day. Another ½ of that on the way home and my afternoon trip to Starbuck’s leads to at least 2 miles per day! I’m still playing around with the ideal workout times now that the commute and schedule are different. I don’t know if there is a “best” strategy yet – I am sure something will emerge soon (when the weather changes) and for now I am trying to do what is comfortable and reach my Crazy Cardio Goal. This means going whenever possible.

Everything Else
Fatigue is the enemy. I am sure there are several causes to the fatigue that I can spend hours analyzing, but I won’t. The fact is that I seem like I am tired often and I need to do something to fix it. I have spoken with a few doctors and am trying to integrate some new (and not so new) habits into my daily living. Most of these are common sense, but as stated earlier – life intervenes. Unfortunately, 1-2 weeks of me failing to be on top of my game has a ripple effect. So, -- I would really like to whine a bit more about how annoying it is to pack mini-lunches, pace my activity on the weekends, etc. – but, instead I hear my husband’s voice “keep it focused” egging me on. I’ll post later on the fatigue issues.

Day Thirty-Seven

I'm on track for the week! Taking my workout clothes on the trip and my eating is on track. I just need to focus on not being stressed.

Day Thirty-Five

Today marks five weeks of using blogging as a tool for maximing my nutrition and exercise goals. I have seen little progress on the scale, but believe that I have set the groundwork for a process that will eventually help me lose weight. I cite as evidence of this progress my decision to spend the evening working out. I managed to have a reasonable dinner with a friend followed by a 60-minute session of cardio and training followed by a leisurely walk home. In many ways, this evening was symbolic of what I would like this journey to be. It was a great end to the week and it will help me start next week on the right note.

I did not reach my goal of 350 minutes of cardio for the second week in the row. Next week I am traveling, but I do not plan to use that as an excuse. It will be harder to manage my diet while on the trip. I recently traveled to Atlanta and found the lowfat, low residue options to be limited. I plan to come prepared with bars, soy jerky, and 1-point desserts that will help satisfy my cravings and help me avoid the lure of restaurant fare. I plan to blog daily about my efforts and to use tomorrow and Sunday as a starting point (e.g., staying within points, 60-90 minute workouts) for reaching my goals.

Day Thirty-Four

I didn't make it to the gym today. I spent the evening volunteering for the CCFA and I have to day that I have no regrets about skipping my workout for this opportunity. Committing time and money to the organization has become an increasingly important part of my life. Interacting with individuals who live with IBD is a reminder of all that I have accomplished despite the odds. My twenty-eight birthday is approaching, which means I have lived with this disease for nearly twenty-three years. I have more than lived with it -- I have thrived. And, each day I make food choices and workout choices and life choices that others with IBD aren't able to make. For them, the disease is a real barrier to life and employment.

Tomorrow, I am going to return to my workouts. The pain and frustration that I felt yesterday during training is nothing compared to the fear and doubt that I confront when experiencing a flare or hospitalization. In fact, it is silly to complain about the sweat and tears of a training session when I sat in a hospital bed 16 months ago worrying that I would never return to the comfortable adult life I'd come to take for granted. Volunteering is supposed to be selfless, but for me it is selfish. The commitment I have made to the organization for the next year is driven in part by my commitment to myself to not forget what motivates me to succeed. I want to do everything in my power not to end up back in that hospital bed and I want to know that if -- by chance -- I do, that I pushed myself in the interim months to be everything that my doctors, family, and friends have supported me to be. I owe it to myself and to them.

So, tomorrow I will come as close as possible to reaching my goal. I will follow up my training with a cardio session. I will then begin the next week with my weight tracker, a 350 minute cardio goal, and a renewed sense of commitment -- not just to myself, but to all those individuals who have provided the care and support to help me maintain my health for all of these years.

Crazy Cardio Challenge Stats

WEEK 1:

Starting Weight - 141.6 (WW)

Saturday -- 50 minutes (Treadmill)
Sunday -- 60 minutes (Treadmill); 20 minutes Strength Training
Monday -- 60 minutes (Elliptical)
Tuesday -- 20 minutes (Treadmill)
Wednesday -- 60 minutes (Elliptical); 10 minutes Strength Training
Thursday -- none
Friday -- none

Minutes until Goal: 90 :(


WEEK 2:

Starting Weight - Unknown

Saturday -- 45 minutes Personal Training
Sunday -- None
Monday -- None
Tuesday -- None
Wednesday -- 30 minutes (Elliptical); 30 minutes Personal Training
Thursday -- None
Friday -- 30 minutes (Elliptical); 30 minutes Personal Training

Minutes until Goal: 195 :(

Personal Training Commentary

I have mixed feelings about personal training. One on hand, I think a trainer can motivate and push you to limits that you would not otherwise reach. On the other had, having a trainer seems like a cop-out -- paying someone to push you seems silly when the issues stem from your own lack of discipline. Despite the mixed feellings, I have experiemented with personal trainers in the past and continue to see it as an important part of my workout process.

I view the trainer as a mix between cheerleader and coach -- praising you for accomplishments and pushing you to strech beyond your means. Negotiating this balance is not an easy task for the trainer and I think selecting the right one goes far beyond picking someone who demonstrates an amazing array of before and after pictures.

What matters to me is that I didn't feel good after my training session tonight. I expect to feel strong after working out. I like the sense of achievement that comes from stretching beyond my means. However, I didn't feel that way today. I came away from it tired, embarrassed and as close to quitting as I have ever been. I couldn't complete a move, I was frustrated and it was humiliating. Who pays to feel that way after a workout? I know that my frustration could've stemmed from fatigue, but this is the second time that the workout has had that effect.

I think that individuals seek trainers for different reasons and that different people require different motivation. Maybe today was just a bad day, but I don't know if that is the case. The best way to address this is to be clear with my trainer about what I need psychologically. He may have physical expertise, but that doesn't mean he knows what I require to be most successful. I am going to give this some more thought before our next session on Friday. I know I got a good workout today, but I don't know that it is worth negative feelings that I had during and after the session.

Day Thirty-Three

Best laid plans. I didn't achieve my goal last week and it seems close to unattainable this week. I have completed 105 minutes this week and have 245 minutes (or approximately 6 hours) to accomplish in 2 days. I don't think I will make it. Knowing that something is not physically possible is not a reason to completely give up. I want to get as close as possible to 350 and will be in the gym tomorrow. And, I plan to achieve the 350 next week despite going out of town. My inability to reach my goal is directly attributable to my lack of sleep. I don't want to spend time lamenting the loss cardio sessions, but I do want to keep in mind the effects.

Attempting to workout six-seven days per week and blogging about my struggles has a significant effect on me last week. I didn't really notice the difference until today. The normal stresses and frustrations of work seemed much greater and my sense of well-being was diminished. Last week had just as many challenges, but I felt better equipped to handle it as I bounced up and down on the cardio machines.

I think it is very important that I don't give up now. I could see how easy it would be to cease the goal and simply focus on "getting enough cardio" in the weeks to come. But, I don't want to settle for that. There will always be business trips, or moves, or sleepless nights to thwart my workout goals. The whole point of developing the habit is figuring out how to make this a part of my life. The hardest part is mental.

Day Twenty-Eight

I didn't workout yesterday and I ended going out to dinner. A couple of sushi rolls, 1.5 drinks, and a chocolate dessert tasting later and I am feeling a bit perturbed. I have every intention of going to the gym today to close out my cardio for the week. However, I have some doubts about the impact of the intense cardio on my weight loss efforts. Overall, my cardio/exercise is up and eating is down -- but, I think my calorie intake may still be too high to generate the weight loss promised in the magazine. I won't be too discouraged -- I think I developed some positive habits and my stress levels were well-managed. Instead, I think I will commit to another week of the plan -- 350 minutes here I come -- and better management of my points. I have some diet tweaks in mind:

• Avoid using all my flexees over the weekend. I need to leave myself 20 or 4/day for the workweek. This will give me about 26-27 points per day after exercise. This is in line with what I ate during the week.
• Overhaul my splurges. The weekend is for relaxing my discipline, but I relaxed too much by going out to dinner last week. Switching out restaurant pizza and cupcakes for microwaveable pizzas and ww desserts should save me over a 1000 calories this weekend.
• Minimize my coffee cream points to 2 per day. I will go back to buying fat free half & half at home. And, I will decrease the amount I am using during my Starbuck's runs. This should save me a few hundred calories.
• Ditch the mayo. I make two cans of tuna per week and use 2-3 tbsp. of mayo per can. Going back to fat free mayonanaise could save me about 500 calories.
• Stick with the WW bars for lunchtime desserts. This worked! The 1-pt bars have no nutritional value and are slightly overpriced, but they satisfy my cravings for peanut butter and chocolate.
• Continue to avoid alcohol. I ordered a drink 2 times last week and I think keeping the alcohol consumption down does wonders for my performance. I am going to keep it to one or none next week, too.

Finally, I am going to maintain my focus on the goal. One week is too soon to make a decision on the impact of new routines. I certainly feel healthier and the noticeable changes in my stamina and endurance give me pride.

Crazy Cardio Commentary

It's lunchtime on Wednesday.

Wow. I just looked at my numbers and I have to work out for 60 minutes per day for the next three days to reach my goal. I patted myself on the back for slogging my way through a light workout last night, but I have a ways to go. (Maybe I should've concentrated on breaking more of a sweat last night?)

Never mind the second-guessing. I'll be in the gym tonight!

Day Twenty-Six

I surprised myself yesterday and ended up going to the gym. I got back from dinner around 8:15 and started flipping through the channels. Somehow I landed on Biggest Loser and I became increasingly more uncomfortable as I watched. I still had energy and felt a sneaking suspicion that I had overeaten (totally confirmed, by the way, by my realization that I had overeaten my day’s points and all of my weekly flexes). So, I decided to go to the gym!

It wasn’t the most inspired workout. I probably spent nearly an hour on the cardio machines, but would only count 20 minutes towards my goal. My exertion levels were low for a lot of the time and I didn’t feel like I was working out at a moderate intensity. However, that isn’t the point. I know that if I had stayed home I would’ve scooped out some ice cream and warmed up a muffin for an unneeded dessert. Every little bit counts.

So, my goal for today is to continue to journal and to workout. I am feeling good about doing it and think I can maintain. I think it will be a struggle to stay within my point limits yesterday, but going to the gym last night might’ve kept me from derailing. One day of splurges doesn’t have to turn into three.

Day Twenty-Five

Today is a likely rest day. It's hard to imagine I will want to go to the gym after a 7:00PM dinner. I felt good today -- good enough to think a workout would be worthwhile, but I am sure I'll be tired later. I think the fact that I feel like working out is a good sign -- it demonstrates to me that the habit is beginning to form and that the desire to exercise can overrule general end of the day fatigue. I've read lots of conflicting opinions about days of rest. Most say that they are critical; some say that even one day without rest is an invitation to drop your workouts.

The logic behind the latter point of view resonates. I can easily see how not going today could easily become a pattern. And, I can see how that has happened with past workout efforts. Giving up vigilance one day is a slippery slope (As a sidenote: I recognize that I stopped tracking this time last week).

What's the takeaway here? Wednesday is Hump Day. It's the day that we start to look towards the end of the week and plan for the weekend. Mentally, I think that my tendency to look and plan for the future puts me at a disadvantage here. It is easy to stop tracking and to ditch workouts when you're building bright and shiny plans for the new week.

What's the plan? Tomorrow I am going to focus on tomorrow. I developed plans for the week and I have a responsibility to see them through -- I will track and workout and make sure that I've done what I planned to do this week before moving on to the next.

Why I Like The Gym

Some people love to workout, but hate the gym. They live for nature and the feel of fresh air as they run, hike, and bike their way to fitness. I am not one of these people. I love the gym. I rarely think to workout outside and when I do it seems to be less vigorous than my usual cardio routine on my beloved equipment. Here are some reasons why:

Television and Magazines
The thrill of working out and achieving your fitness goals can only go so far. Sometimes I am sweating through the last twenty minutes thinking "why am I still here? I've done enough. I can go home." It helps that everything I would go home to do (ahem watch tv) is right there! No excuses...

The People
The best part by far! Nothing motivates me more than the healthy competition that comes from seeing one run a little faster, climb a little higher, or persevere a bit longer than me. I know it's not PC, but this works. Being in the gym with other people who work out makes me want to work out. It motivates and hardly ever deters. I know some people might get discouraged by someone in better shape, but I like to think that they started out slightly lazy and are in need of motivation like me.

The Music
Okay, not really. I never listen to the music. I bring my IPOD and play the heck out my cardio mix. However, I think I would listen to it if I ever forgot my IPOD or ran out of batteries.

The Mirrors
Again, not PC but totally honest. It's good for watching form and every once in a while it's cool to work your muscle and actually see it as you go through the exercising motion. This is not to be confused with standing in front of the mirror and shamelessly checking oneself out from all vantage points in full view of all amused gym goers.

The People
They deserve another line. Because the only thing better than watching people for motivation is listening for motivation. Trainers are great because I have picked up many exercise tips or weight training variations from spying on other people's sessions.

Day Twenty-Four: Why We Succeed

I did it. I wanted to make it and I succeeded. It hurt. I'm tired. But, I feel fantastic!

Day Twenty-Four: Why We Fail

Today's workout is going to be difficult. I have a long history of false starts and failures with exercise plans. It usually traces back to overzealousness followed by fatigue or injury followed by long periods of inactivity on the couch punctuated by muttering "I hate the gym" and "why don't my clothes fit?" Repeat as necessary.

The reasons for these patterns are complex. I can't chalk it up to pure laziness -- my workouts can be pretty intense when I am at my peak. I reflected for a bit when I was in the doctor's office and this is what I came up with --

Fatigue. Everyone gets tired eventually. However, I feel like there is a barely perceptible line between pushing myself to my limit and overdoing it. Sometimes I push myself to my limits and pay the price.

Fear. I wonder if other people with chronic illness experience the type of fear that I reference here? I find that there are few things worse than the knowledge that a flare could be the result of my own behavior, specifically a lack of discipline. Engaging in bad behavior (e.g., overeating, too much drinking, not enough exercise) seems much worse when the consequences are chronic pain or hospitalizations. The stakes for everyday decisions about snacks and going to the gym seem to take on much greater weight. The cop-out here is goal depression. That is, avoidance of lofty aspirations in an effort to prevent or lessen the impact of failure.

Pain. I don't like it. That "darn that was a good workout ache" is fine, but acute or episodic pain that seems to stem from the body attacking itself during normal functions like digestion...not cool. Pain is probably the most abstract and most concrete barrier to pushing myself to set and reach certain goals. I have a high tolerance for pain, but I don't like it. So, I am probably more stressed out trying top identify and avoid pain triggers than I am actually dealing with it when it occurs. Who wants to push themselves to the limits only to experience injury that leads to fatigue (number one cause of overeating) and injury (number one cause of couch potatoism), which always exacerbate my IBD symptoms.

So, how does one deal? If I really knew, I wouldn't be blogging.

Okay, seriously -- I am writing because I am committing to making a change. If I thought that avoiding my limits and playing it safe would get me where I wanted to go, then I wouldn't bother pondering (and actually taking) risks.

It's hard. It sucks. Sometimes....ok maybe lots of times I fail. But, I do it because I'd rather be a risk-taker who failed than someone who stayed home and totally missed the party!

A Crazy Cardio Challenge

I read an article yesterday that stated one could lose approximately 8lbs. by doing 350 minutes of cardio per week. The 350 minutes includes two sessions of strength training that focus on compound movements that work the whole body.

The Good - I admit that I am a sucker for a challenge. Seriously, I reread my posts and I seem to have a new one every week. I read this and it pushed me to blast through 50 minutes yesterday. I reread it today and I managed to get through 60 minutes.

The Bad - I don't believe in working out seven days of week so this workout requires approximately 60 minutes of cardio six days per week. It feels a bit like setting oneself up for failure and there is truly no magic in it. Who wouldn't lose weight working out for 6 days a week for an entire month? The articles states that one should maintain moderate intensity and gives lots of suggestions for cross-training (one could definitely get hurt here) to reduce the risk for injury.

The Verdict - What do I have to lose? Well, obviously the weight. I can't resist the lure of losing eight pounds. And, I am in my fourth week now. My results have been largely emotional (increased stamina, stability in eating), but not physical. I am going to give it a go!

Day Twenty-Three

Another successful workout and my eating is on track! I can't say that I have seen a change in the scales now that I am three weeks in, but I did detect an importance difference today. My stamina has increased -- I am able to tolerate longer, more vigorous workouts. And, my craving for junk food has decreased. The enjoyment of the workouts is extending into my meal choice. I am reaching for better choices that will fuel my body. Nothing ruins a workout more than a sugar crash...

I also realized that WW was easier last week. I was up in the scales and didn't track every day, but I don't recall feeling incredibly deprived or ravenous at any given point. This is important because one of the problems with low residue diets can be the carb crave cycle that leads to binging, crashing, and that uncomfortable feeling that you'll never get your diet under control.