My Current Daily Residue

Odd title. Could've just said here's what I am eating:


1/2 SB Bar -- 2pts

Protein: 5

Exercise
1/2 c greek yogurt -- 1 pts
1/2 c cereal -- 1pt
1/2 c coffee -- 1pt (counting the cream)

Protein: 20

Snack
Grapes -- 1pts
Hardboiled egg -- 2 pts
1 c coffee -- 1 pt (more cream)

Protein: 20

Lunch
2.5oz tuna -- 3 pts
Peppers -- 0 pt
Grain -- 2 pts
WW cookie or cake -- 1 pt

Protein: 15

Snack
Hardboiled egg -- 2pts
1/2 SB Bar -- 1 pts
1 c fruit -- 1 pts

Protein: 8

If you're keeping count, you know that I've already reached 19 points without adding points for activity. Dipping into the flexees enables the following:

1/2 c yogurt -- 1pts
1 waffle -- 1pt
Wine -- 2pts

or substitute tuna, veggies, and cake for same amount of points

This leaves 3 catchall points.

Stat Check

I still refuse to be chained to a scale. Not healthy, not a long-term plan for managing my life. My work tends to flow in logic models, so I will treat the scale and the corresponding weight (loss!) as an output -- as in evidence of change -- but, not the desired outcome -- as in looking and feeling great! WW encourages the 10% so here is mine:

As of 4/23/10

Starting Weight: 143

Interim Goal: 138 (May 8)

Goal Weight: 127

Timeline: 10 weeks (aka 4th of July)

(Gotta have timeline or else I'll give up before I get started. And, I have a song stuck in my head. It goes "she wore an eensy weensy teeny weenie hot pink bikini."

Yup, I totally went there.

The 350 Challenge is Back

Some time ago I blogged about the difference between trying to fit the gym in the schedule and accepting that it's a necessary part of my day. I've been going consistently for the past few weeks and it has definitely shifted to the latter. However, fitting it into my busy schedule (no complaints about being busy -- you can't run around accomplishing great things when you're feeling ill) takes creativity. I don't know what the week will bring, but the following times have been set.

Saturday, April 24
7:00AM - 8:00AM 60 minutes of cardio

Update: I was 10 minutes late and only got 50 minutes in, went back later and did another 50. 60 on rower; 15 on elliptical; and 15 on treadmill.

Sunday, April 25
830ish-10ish 60 minutes of cardio; 30 minutes weights

Update: I did a cardio super circuit! Had some cashews the day before and wanted to make sure I was extremely active -- 12m on bike, 12m on elliptical, 12m on rower, 24m on treadmill, and push-ups/sit-ups/squats/lunges in between each circuit.

Monday, April 26
6:15AM-6:50AM 35 minutes of weights

Update: The bad news is I woke up at 4:30, the good news is that I gave up on going back to sleep at 5:30 and squeezed 50 minutes of cardio into my morning. I went back in the evening and got another 15 minutes of bike riding followed by 15 minutes of weights. Looking forward to total and complete rest tomorrow!

Tuesday, April 27
TBD 20minutes of walking

Wednesday, April 28
6:15AM-6:50AM 35 minutes of weights
8:00PM-9:00PM 60 minutes of cardio

Update: Didn't exactly make it back for part two of the workout. But, I did get in a great workout in the morning -- who knew a jump squat could be so effective?

Thursday, April 29
TBD 20minutes of walking

Update: I got up this morning and made my way to the gym to combat the guilt of missing last night. not the longest workout -- those jump squats linger -- but, I the role of early morning activity in facilitating my digestion can't be underestimated. I ate melon today! I need to get in another 30 tomorrow.

Friday, April 30
6:15AM-6:50 35 minutes of weights

Two light days, two planned days of sleeeping in, and good nutrition will supplement the foundation that I've been building the past few weeks.

Exactly How Many Points?

So, listing the points is pointless unless I have a limit to go with it:

Using their oh so complicated height/weight/gender/reastfeeding calculator nets me...

19 points per day. (So not a lot)

You get an extra 35 per week. (Not looking so bad)

And, I have to continue to be active or else risk losing my ability to eat out of the grains and fruits/vegetables food groups. I've already decided to return to September and October's 350 minutes of activity per week. I'll skip counting beads of sweat and keep to 3 activity points earned per hour of exercise.

To Recap:

19 base pts per day
35 points per week
17 activity points per week

Hmm..that gives me roughly 26 per week. Not so bad really. Writing it feels more complicated than what I think it'll be. We'll see how it goes.

Low Residue Food Groups

I looked back on my posts for the past 9 or so months and have come up with my low residue food groups; these are four unscientific groups of foods that meet several criteria:

1) I like them.
2) They are staples that have, at one time or another, been my go to foods for years.
3) I like them.
4) In aggregate, they provide a reasonable mix of nutrition and splurging.

I've assigned them WW points values because I think I will benefit from counting -- not because I want to torture myself or deviate from the 6 even spaced small meals that I've used in the past, but because I think the numbering system might override mindless snacking (mindless in this case is spelled: wheat thins).

Please note: I've collapsed the USDA food groups into new groups that meet my needs.

Protein
Eggs -- 2 pts
2.5oz Tuna (salmon, scallops) -- 3 pts
1c Greek yogurt (0%; without the fruit, caramel, or chocolate)-- 2 pts
SB Protein Bars -- 3 pts
String Cheese -- 2 pts

"Grains"
Kashi Cereal (no more than 1/2 c) -- 1 pt
Kashi Fruit Bars -- 3 pts
1 Kashi Waffles -- 1 pt
Arnold Sandwich Thins -- 1 pt

Fruits/Vegetables
1 c Grapes -- 1 pt
1 c Melon -- 1 pt
1 c Small Berries -- 1pt
Finely Chopped Spinach -- 0 pts
Bell Peppers -- 0 pts

Empty Sugars
1 pt WW cookies, bars, cakes -- 1pt
wine -- 2 pts
scotch; whiskey -- 2 pts

How Much Food Do I Need

It's an absurdly silly question, but I don't really have an answer. Plenty of online calculators will give me a target -- but, I know well that a number target in your mind says nothing about what your body craves as it goes throughout the day.

I've been playing around with my schedule lately in an effort to get in more time at the gym. I have much more energy during the day and feel better mentally and physically, but it seems like my mindless snacking has increased as well. I know that pure cardio in the mornings revs my hunger and often causes me to overcompensate for what I feel I've lost. Conversely, weight training suppresses my hunger in the mornings. With this and the impending bathing suit in mind, I think I am going to try something new (or, not so new) to help moderate my snacking.

Quite frankly, I think I've gotten too comfortable with snacking on poor food choices (crackers and cookies), which leads to an endless cycle of sugar crashes. I've mentioned here before that Weight Watchers worked and that I was hesitant to go back because of the program's emphasis on core (aka fiber-filled) foods that I am supposed to avoid. However, I've learned a lot about what I can and cannot eat and what I can and cannot do. So, I figure its worth me revisiting the plans maxims in an effort to learn moderation.

I've given this quite a lot of thought and will break it up into several posts over the next few days.

Little Changes, Big Impact

I made it to the gym four times this week and am on schedule for another four this week. I can't say that each workout has been some hour-plus calorie blaster. In fact, at least two of my workouts last week were fewer than 30 minutes. But, I still made it.

I think the act of getting up and going (all four workouts took place before 9am, 2 before 7am) was important. Exercising (or not) and eating well (or not) are behavioral patterns. I know that if I continue to make the effort to go -- if I simply get into the habit of waking up and going, then then my body and desire to perform well will take over.

Ninety percent of exercise is mental, which can be a good and bad thing. It's bad because the brain can play all sorts of tricks that prevent us from taking positive steps towards a goal. It's a good think because you can "train" your brain to be disciplined and without ever breaking a sweat. Indeed, the title of my post doesn't refer to any sort of micro phsyical changes that I've seen in the last week. Instead, it refers to the small mental changes that I've made. Here are some examples (what's a post without illustrative examples?!):

Mental Trick One: Hide the Emergency $20!

I am supposed to keep a $20 bill in my wallet for emergencies. Without it, I would be cashless since I depend on my debit for all of my purchases. However, I recently realized something about my emergency $20 -- having it in my wallet predisposes me to take cabs home! It's amazing. Somehow, I am at my most tired and least able to deal with the subway when I know that $20 is there for the "emergency cab."

My "get out of the gym" free pass works the same way. And, it's ALWAYS there. Yup, it's the little card in the back of my mind that is ready to be used whenever I'm sleepy, in need of a little tv, or just plain lazy. Once I use that little card, it becomes really hard to ignore it's presence -- just like the $20. In fact, I seem to go out of my way to look for reasons to whip it out right before I'm supposed to go to the gym.

So, what's the trick? There is none. Let me repeat. There is none. If, in the moment, you can hear the little voice somewhere in the back of the brain teasing you that you're being lazy, then you probably are. Save yourself the regret and guilt and leave the $20 in your wallet.

Mental Trick Two: Trick the Treats!

This is the converse of the emergency $20. Let me demonstrate how the treat plays out in life outside the gym. After a rough day of work, I like to come home and put my feet up. I deserve it. I work hard. Pay my dues. Smile when I don't want to. Perform tasks that belong to others. All of that hard work when I get home means that I don't owe anybody anything. Even me! If cookie-liking me wants a cookie, then calorie-counting me has to wait!

So, what's wrong with this? There's nothing wrong with a treat once in a while, right? Well, yes. But, I can say in all honestly that the above paragraph characterizes every day at work. I smile when I don't want to every day. I do stuff that I "technically" shouldn't every day. On a daily level, giving myself a little treat wouldn't matter so much -- but, treats add up!

What if every day I came home and rewarded myself by eating a cookie and not going to the gym? (This, in fact, characterizes my last week so thank goodness I went in the mornings!) The treat becomes an excuse for the brain not to do things it doesn't want to do. Justifying it with "good behavior" during the day makes it no less impactful on the decisions we make in other parts of our life.

There are a couple of ways to deal with this and I confess to using both at times:

a) Change the treat. It's a time-honed diet technique -- change your reward structure. If days at work are hard, then visualizing positive after work activities can be the anchor that helps propel us through it. However, the brain knows that a trip to the gym is more rewwarding than a cookie. Or, drinking a glass of wine only makes the next day that much harder. The trick here is asking yourself "is this the treat I need?"

b) Eliminate need for treat. This one, on the surface, appears harder. Most people need incentives to get through things when they suck. (It's true, right?) However, sometimes you have to stop and ask yourself "how much does this really suck?" Like the $20 (this brain stuff is all related), it can be easy to fall into a pattern of looking for a reason to give yourself a treat.

We often invest so much energy into preparing for a task that we feel the need to rewards ourselves -- even though 90% of the hard work was spent preparing to deal with how hard the task is! Does this even make sense?! The brain is pretty powerful and quite capacble of engaging in all sort of activities to support a narrative that we've made up. So, if I start my morning saying "my day is going to suck," then it often does. And, I come home needing a trick. On the other hand, if I start my day saying "I wonder what today will be like?" or "today should be fun," then I am not as predisposed to allowing my tired self to take over at the end of the day. This is a good thing because my tired self likes cookies and hates the gym.

(PS -- One can also see how the treat plays out negatively when engaging in a little bit of gym time and thinking that the number of allowable cookies doubles, but I will not cover that hear.)

Mental Trick Three: Give up on Little Orphan Annie.

What?

Seriously?

Yup, Little Orphan Annie ruined it for us all. Her singing and beguiling smile convinced a generation that if they just waited by the window dreaming, then all that they wanted would come true. Tomorrow. Although the movie didn't show it, I suspect that Annie spent a whole lot of nights singing about tomorrow before Daddy Warbucks ever appeared. And, for all of her good luck, there were many less fortunate children who dodn't fare as well in the movie.

Despite this fact, we live in a constant dream state about the possibilities of tomorrow. As I type this, I am thinking that tomorrow I will not indulge in cupcake frosting. I'm also thinking that I will get to the gym 10 minutes earlier so I can warm-up before my training session. Tomorrow.

Not really much more to say here other than I know that the cupcakes will still be here tomorrow. And, after the cupcakes are gone, I should have a bag of cookies. And, I maybe didn't run as fast as I could today on the treadmill. But, I will. Tomorrow.

I don't particularly like thinking of myself as an unpowerful young girl wishing for someone to swoop in to solve all of my problems. This was the unfortunate narrative for Annie, but it isn't me. I was raised to be independent and strong.

If I want something enough, then I can get it. It might not be here by tomorrow, but there are still things that I can do today. There are things that I can do every day.

The trick? Sing a few bars and see if it makes you feel just a bit silly...

I went

I pushed myself to my limits and I feel great because of it. It is like flipping a switch. I have been focusing on what I can do instead of emphasizing what I can't. I think chronic health conditions affect people in different ways. Some become obsessed and defined by challenging their physical or mental barriers. They never take no for answer.

I am not that type.

I am more like the person who has used pragmatism to define what I can accomplish. This formula involves trying and testing what I can and can't do within pre-established boundaries. It's a safe, sensible, risk-adverse approach to living life as an individual aware of the fragility of physical health.

I think there are no barriers more challenging than the ones we place upon ourselves. I'll go one step further and say that many health conditions are just aother variable to take into account when trying to achieve a goal.

At work, I'd never say that a colleague's bad attitude should stop me from pursuing a goal.

I'm not going to let a stack of unpacked boxes stop me from having a party in few weeks.

Annoying and unpredictable variables come up all the time and it is critical that we judge ourselves on how we manage them in an effort to achieve our goal.

I've been focusing on the same thing in the past week -- in essence, a four post pep talk. Buried in the lyric-laced musings are efforts to build and refine my personal motivation. I think I am just about there.